Starting point
by Clarlie
Summary: The path of the hero wasn't for Atton Rand. Like the path of a Jedi. He had always known it. But it looks like the Force and his destiny has another plans. Will he fight it or accept at last?
1. Chapter 1

I don't own KOTOR or any of its heroes. Atton Rand's character isn't mine.

Hope you'll like it and I'm waiting for your reviews.

**Starting point**

_Prologue_

He didn't know when it was, the staring point. Was it the day when he met the Exile or when they left from Malachor V? Or…actually he always knew it but didn't want to remember. He wanted to forget this little dream, vision; he didn't know how to call it. But it came again and again haunting him in his dreams.

Korribean. The home of Siths, place filled with the darkness so much he almost could see it. Why in the world he came into this cave instead of leaving the Exile alone as he was asked to? He wanted to play a hero? No, something different was here. Curiosity? Yes, maybe it was the right word to describe what he felt while entering this dark place.

Bright light flashed somewhere in front of him as he entered into the small room. Chill went down his skin as he realized he wasn't alone. Two silhouettes fought in almost complete darkness – Jedi and Sith. So different, so alike in the dim light of their lightsabers.

At first moment he rushed to help the Exile but then he realized he was wrong. He…Exile…wasn't here. There were someone else.

Even with his untrained Force perception he could feel the aura of light around the Jedi. He had…so bright Force…so strong! He shuddered when he turned to the Sith. He never felt such darkness in his life even facing dark Jedi masters. This creature was like the dark side itself, no more or less.

But just who were they? He stopped not really knowing what to do. It was impossible to help the Jedi – the opponents moved at the speeds he could never dream of. If he tried to fire he could end up hitting the wrong person. So he just stood and watched.

The Jedi moved his ligthsaber close to his opponent's masked face and for a moment he saw him and tried to do his best not to scream. Jedi's face…it was...him! More concentrated, more serious but it was like he was looking at the mirror.

"It just can't be," he whispered stepping back feeling fear coming closer to his heart.

Of course, it was a nightmare and all he had to do was to awake but he couldn't! It was too real to be just a dream.

Jedi stepped back avoiding the strike. Looked like the Sith was becoming stronger with every minute while the movements of his opponent started to weaken.

Another strike – and the blue lightsaber cutting the mask fell on the floor of the cave like its owner. Dead.

"No," he whispered looking at this awful scene. Why did he do nothing to stop it? A second later he realized that he had bigger problems than to think about it.

The Sith turned to him his red lighsaber ready to strike and he suddenly understood he was defenseless. But he couldn't help but just stand and stare at the Sith's face. His own face full of rage with those nonhuman features dark side of the Force added. The Jedi…then the Sith. Both of them had his face, what was the reason of it?

Red weapon rushed to his face and all his thoughts disappeared at the same time. Here was the enemy, him or not, but he had a lightsaber and intended to kill him. To survive – that was the purpose and to know the truth was only the second one. Another strike – and his hand found something his unlucky double had lost. Small metal cylinder were made just like for him – so comfortable it felt to hold it. He activated it just in time – the red lightsaber was ready to kill him.

"Not..so..fast," he forced himself to smile to feel better parrying the strike and then another one and another. This Sith was really strong and he wasn't a match for him – he understood at the moment he began the fight. But did he have a choice?

"Come on, say something, you!" he shouted loosing his temper while parrying another attack. "Why are you doing it?"

The Sith was silent and it scared him a lot. Another attack – and it finally happened – he moved his untrained hand too far and this creature stroke him. Pain was overwhelming. He fell on his knees holding his side. The Sith came closer preparing for the final strike.

"No…" he whispered with his shaking lips. "I…don't wanna die."

He didn't want to die…because…just because there were so many pazaak games he hasn't won yet. Because his name wasn't carved yet close to the names of the best pilots in the galaxy. There were still so many things to do. To win the war against the Siths, to help the Exile…Not just because he wanted money or glory…just because it felt like the right thing to do.

And the darkness began to dissipate almost like it heard his thoughts. The dark silhouette of the Sith disappeared leaving him alone and the light came closer.

He opened his eyes to find himself in the pilot's seat at Ebon Hawk.

"I slept all the time?" he thought in panic. But the dream was so real…how in the world it could be? There weren't a scratch at his side, just impossible!

"Just a dream," he sighed with joy and then realized that just a little thing didn't fall into the puzzle. Blue-crystal lightsaber was laying in Atton Rand's hand peacefully crashing all his possible theories.


	2. Chapter 2

This is the first chapter, I hope, you'll like it. English isn't my native language so there are grammar errors. I'm looking for beta-reader for this story. If you'd like to help me, write at Thank you!

**Chapter 1. The ends and beginnings**

"This landing will be a soft one," he thought pulling the controls. After all this extreme flights all over the galaxy it seemed like a peace of cake.

But it was strange; he felt like he wanted something to happen again. He wanted them to take another crazy mission, to find Sith base, to save some planet, to do anything – but not to let this moment happen, the moment of farewell.

"Come on, Rand, you are acting like a girl. What will you do next, are you going to cry aloud and ask them to accept you in their Jedi academy too?" he hummed and answered to himself. "I have already decided. No more Jedies or Siths in my life!"

"Trying to convince yourself?" he heard someone ironic voice behind his back.

Atton turned around to find smirking Mira who was looking at him with interest.

"Just making a promise," he smiled. "Well, the trip is over. Passengers are free to leave."

"Is it an offer," her smile became wider. "Or an order?"

He looked at her.

"I just wanted to make goodbyes easier, that's all," he sighed. "But you aren't going to let me snick out that easy, are you?"

"Nah," she shook her head. "Even if I'd like to the guys won't let you go away without any word."

"Ok," Atton shut the throttle down and went to the exit.

They have already waited him at the landing place, all of them – Bao Dur whose knowledge of ship mechanics saved them for many times, Visas who scared him sometimes but always was a proved backup in battle, handmaiden with beautiful name Brianna whose swordfight mastership he envied a lot and of course the one who started it all, Arven Kepher, the Exile, a newer head of the Jedi academy at Coruscant. Jedi master and four his pupils, the beginning of new Jedi order.

Atton inhaled deeply. Here was this moment, it happened. He had to say goodbyes.

Mira hanged on his neck and freed him out of these heavy thoughts.

"See you, cute one," she kissed his cheek.

"Don't let them turn into bunch of boring typos, ok?" he smiled.

"Count on me," she nodded. "Stay out of prisons, it seems like you have a habit to fall into them, don't you?"

"I swear I won't be closer than a parsec to them," Atton laughed.

He turned around to shake Bao Dur's hand.

"Thank you," he said simply. "If it wasn't you we would be dead there, at Malachor."

"I can tell the same to you," iridonian nodded.

"You are a good fighter," Brianna acknowledged. "You talk a lot, that's true, but your skills are almost equal to mine. I'm looking forward to spar with you when you return."

It sounded a little harsh but Atton knew – it was a great praise in her lips.

"I think you'll learn a lot of Jedi stuff till the time we met again," he smiled. "So you'll kick my ass easily. But I'm looking forward to it anyway."

Visas came to him like a ghost.

"Your future is clouded," her words scared him.

"Yeah, baby," he tried to make the situation easier. "You maybe right because I'm going to drink myself to the mist in my head at the next cantina!"

He couldn't believe – she even smiled a little!

"Just be careful," she whispered and stepped back.

Finally Atton's attention turned to the man standing a few steps further to him, the Exile.

"Maybe you would change your mind?" Arven offered. "You'll be a good Jedi knight."

Atton sighed. Here it comes again, the talk they had so many times during their trip that he lost his count.

"No, friend," he shook his head. "Siths, Jedis, this life…it's not for me, really."

"But the Force," Arven insisted. "It's the part of you, Atton. You won't be the whole if you refuse it."

"Let it be," Rand shrugged. "That's the way I am, Atton Rand."

The exile looked disappointed.

"Well, it's your choice, friend," he breathed out a sad smile. "Just…remember…There are times in your life when you run from you past, that's true, but you can't do it forever. There will be the moment when you'll have to decide who you are and just accept it; otherwise you'll lose everything you have. And at that moment you should raise your weapon and fight till the end."

"You know, you'll become a good Jedi master," Atton laughed doing his best to show this speech didn't affect him at all. "Your manner of talk already looks like it."

Arven sighed. Here was Atton Rand, how many times he did it, changed the topic before he could convince him?

He turned to his friend and saw he's already walking to his ship. That's right, no goodbyes, no big words; it looked like Atton Rand will just return the next day.

Atton made a few steps and turned around and Arven felt he is mistaken. This farewell was difficult for the cocky pilot too.

"If something occurs," Atton's look was uncertain. "Just find me. I'll do anything to help."

That was unexpected and for a moment Arven just stared at him in shock. It was…so unlike to Rand!

"Of course," he nodded coping with his feelings.

T3 met him near the spaceship's ladder whistling something Atton truly didn't understand but felt like little robot asks him about their destination.

"We are going to Nar Reel, T3," he smiled. "The best place to begin everything with clear page. It's not so far from Nar Shaada and nobody knows about us there."

T3 whistled again in uncertain manner.

"You don't think it's a good idea, are you?" pilot laughed. "Come on, with such a big spaceship as Ebon Hawk we can't just have some troubles with work, they'll run to us their purses open to ask us to do some job!"

He went up the ladder T3 following him.

"A few hours of playing pazaak and we are there," Atton muttered. "By the way, do you wanna join, little one?"

Hysterical whistle was an answer to him.

Arven came to Visas who kept watching the ship disappearing at the Coruscant's sky.

"You saw something in his future, aren't you?" he asked in a small voice.

She shook her head.

"Too much disturbance," she finally answered. "Looks like his future isn't written…yet. Strange. I haven't seen such a thing in my life. What about you, master?"

Arven shrugged.

"I have a feeling we'll meet again," he said. "But the man I'll meet won't be the same Atton Rand we knew."

"But who he'll be then," miraluka turned to him in search of answer. "Jedi or Sith?"

It looked like a shadow ran along Arven's face.

"I don't know, Visas," he confessed. "Truth to be told, it scares me a lot."

-------------------

_Wooden stick met another one in air then its owner turned it a little, pressed, and it fell out of his opponent's hands._

"_Give up, Sith, or I'll kill you!" boy shouted._

"_It's not fair, Jaq, you are always a Jedi knight in this game and I am always the Sith. I'm tired of it, let's switch!" another boy cried._

"_Nah," his brown haired friend smiled. "Good must be stronger that evil and you always lose. When you win you'll be a Jedi too!"_

"_Jaq!" he heard a familiar voice and turned around not believing his eyes._

"_Dad!" he rushed to black haired man standing near the playing ground. _

_The man hugged him tightly._

"_When did you arrive?" seven years old boy asked._

"_A few hours ago," his father answered. "I have a present for you…" he began to check his pockets. "Maybe…I've lost it…"_

"_Dad!" kid growled in lower voice._

"_Just joking," dark haired gave a wide smile to him and finally pulled out a small box. "Here you are!"_

_Boy opened the box and smile spread on his face. "I didn't have this one in my spaceship collection!" he shouted with joy. "I couldn't find it anywhere here…how did you know?"_

"_Well," his father smiled. "I have my secrets. Come on, mom is waiting for us…" he took boy's hand and they went towards a small house._

_--------------------_

A signal from command panel woke him up. Atton yawned remembering where he was. This night was without familiar nightmares and he didn't feel tired as he used to be. But…it was rather unexpected. Why having such a dream when he thought he had almost forgotten his original name, not mention the family? Yet it felt good remembering them. Everything was much easier those days.

T3 whistled reminding him about the landing.

"Yes, I know, I know…" Rand answered turning off autopilot. He didn't know what Bao Dur did to his spaceship but it worked perfect. A few minutes – and he landed at the small spaceport.

People, non-humanoid creatures were walking here and there, some of them rushing not paying attention to their surroundings, some of them stopped to watch a big ship landing not far from them and then continued going.

Atton went out of Ebon Hawk examining his surroundings.

"New life, like it was at Nar Shaada," he smiled. "No, now it's better. I don't have Siths on my tail. Nobody knows me here."

"Jaq Rand?" someone's unpleasant voice snapped him out of his dreams.

"I jinxed it, aren't I?" Atton growled in a small voice while turning around.

Thin twi'lek in clothes worth to buy half an Ebon Hawk was standing nervously looking at him.

"Mister Jaq Rand?" he repeated.

"I don't know who you are talking about," Atton shrugged. "I'm Atton Rand and don't know anybody called 'Jaq'."

Twi'lek smiled in awkward manner.

"Of course, Atton is your name now; I didn't want to be impolite. I just wanted you to understand I know you, mister Rand."

"Can't tell the same about you," Atton looked attentively at him. This twi'lek obviously knew too much of his history and it was foolish to deny everything.

"Thousand apologizes," twi'lek nodded. "I'm Tolla, representative of some…let's say it, some power group on this planet."

"And what do you want of me?" Atton asked in annoyed manner.

"Your reputation," twi'lek smiled again and Rand felt an urgent desire in his mind to kill him now at that place only not to see this smile again. "I have heard a lot of stories of your abilities in some fields, mister Rand."

"Cut it out already," Atton told him impatiently. "If you want to ask me to do something, do it now, otherwise I have a lot of things to…"

"Our boss was very impressed in your talents in some fields," twi'lek began not giving Atton a chance to finish the talk. "To be exact, in your Jedi capturing skills."

Something inside Atton's chest began to freeze with fear. How…how in the world they could know about this part of his past!

"Mister Rand," meanwhile twi'lek continued. "I have a job for you that requires your skills. My boss, Katu, pays well."

"I see," Atton muttered looking at the twi'lek.

"We have the information that a Jedi is somewhere in our city," Tolla began. "The Exchange pays good money for them."

"Why don't you find him yourself?" Atton asked. "If your boss is so…powerful…you could send any mercenary for this mission!"

"Actually we did," twi'lek sighed. "Some of our people disappeared and the others found nothing."

"Just find another man," Atton advised him and turned around to go away.

"Mister Rand!" twi'lek ran to him. "I offer 30 of the total price for this Jedi the Exchange offers!"

Atton continued walking.

"50!" twi'lek didn't give up.

"Look," Atton turned around. "I'm not interested. If you know me so well you know the other thing – those who made me angry didn't live long!"

"_But…you could help this Jedi_," unexpected thought appeared into his mind.

"_No more Siths or Jedis – I promised,_" he reminded himself making another step.

"Ok, 70," twi'lek shouted. "But do something with this Jedi!"

Atton stopped.

"What has he done to you if you want him dead so badly?" he raised his brow.

"Nothing special," twi'lek smiled again. "You'll be paid a bonus if you finish your work quickly though."

That sounded interesting. For a moment just a part of him was ready to answer 'yes' and do the job but the other part remembered about Arven and his academy. He couldn't do it, not after all that happened during their trip!

"Ok," he turned to the twi'lek finally. "I'll do the job; just give me all the information about this Jedi. I'll find him."

"Boss prefers to see him alive. The Exchange pays twice higher for captured Jedis," Tolla explained. "The information is on this chip," he gave Atton a small mechanism. "Here's our boss's card. You'll find his office easily. It's the biggest house at the city."

Atton nodded.

"And…just a piece of advice, Mister Rand," twi'lek stopped him once again. "Don't try to fool our boss. He doesn't like it. Otherwise your true identity will be reveled. I think there are a lot of people dreaming for the revenge to you."

"I understand," Atton nodded. "But if your boss decides to play his own game with me I warn you – Jedis aren't the only ones I can kill," his cold tone would make shaking everyone but it looked like this twi'lek had seen too much in his life to be scared.

"Nice working to you," he just smiled and went away.

T3 moved closer to Atton and whistled in uncertain tone.

"Yes, I know," pilot said. "I don't like it either. I maybe caught some heroic microbe from Arven. Let's just find this Jedi, give him a ride to the Coruscant and that's all."

He sighed.

"It sounds like a piece of cake but actually I've got a bad feeling about this," he confessed.


End file.
